Friends, Fat and Fabulous!

So, the healthy living thing is proving a challenge.  Two weeks and 400gs down.  Of course, the soul searching has begun.  It starts with those little thoughts.  The ones I know the answer too, but ask anyway.  How did I get here?  And really, is it that important?  (Starting to live healthy now!)  I feel angry and frustrated, why me!  Why is it so difficult?  

Ok, so enough self-pity and that somehow sifts my focus to friends.  Friendship is one of our most undervalued commodities.  I have this friend Astrid.  She is proving to be the wisdom I focus on.  She’s tactful.  Intelligent, understanding and loves me anyway.  So I listen.  We walk on the Sea Point promenade when we have time.  

I had fooled myself into believing I could do this my way.  The way that got me into this mess in the first place, so not sure how that mentality works.  I joined Weight Watchers, counted the points, and cheated.  Convinced myself I was making better choices.  Well I am making better choices, but it’s not enough.  400gs!  Two weeks!  Really!  Come now chicken!



On Mondays walk Astrid made a comment, that if I was on this journey, shouldn’t I make more of an effort?  (It was gentle and kind and I got it!)  Well I am making an effort; I walk when I can, making better choices, and 400gs later!  I need to find something I like doing, something I want to do every day.  I need to eat more of the good things, and not small amounts of the bad things.  I needed to listen to a friend.  I needed to have as much faith in myself as she has in me.  

So what do I like doing!  I like water.  I LOVE water.  So how about Aqua aerobics?  Awesome!  Only one problem, where on this green earth do I find a swimming contraption I fit into, 1.  And 2, how the hell will I ever get myself to appear in public?  Hello!!!  Take deep breaths, in and out, in and out!  

It takes a big person (no pun intended) to cross these obstacles!  :) I am a big person, and I’ll get over it!  A means to an end!  Focus, determination, and no “skaam”!! (shame)….
Aqua it is, this weekend will be the search for the costume, and then next week it’s finding Nemo!  I’ll let you know how it all goes!  And I’ll have to keep that friend, she knows a thing or two! ;)

The Journey to Now.

Taking things for granted and being unconscious in my own skin.  That’s the way I’d describe everything before this time.  I have never felt more alive than focusing on the space, activity, and participation of any mundane activity.  Like brushing your teeth.  How many of us can describe that act in detail?  Does it differ from one morning to the next?  Would you know if it did?  Could you change another person’s life if you didn’t?  Would you want too? 

Many questions I know.  Nevertheless, you really need to think about the focus of your consciousness.  What is our karma?  If your daily existence could touch the lives of others, make a difference in their lives, would you not want to make sure that that impact was a positive one. 

Do we realise that our lives are all linked, and that we touch everyone in our community.  Our part is not always to exist within it; we might need to be the light that shines.  The example that others follow.  To do that you need to be more accepting of others.  You need to understand that they too have a part to play in this community.  Even if it is to show you that you are on the right path, that you have gifts, and that you are a light. 

Nothing in your life will change if you do not change the way you do the mundane things.  We will never be noticed if we follow the pack.  We need to be out front.  We need to set the example.  That’s not always so easy.  You are also only human, and you have good days and bad days.  It really is how you get through those tough times that make the good times so much sweeter. 

Remember that to touch a life you do not need to do good deeds only.  Showing people how to be better, guiding them and letting them find their own way is far more valuable than doing things for them.  You take peoples power away when you take over their lives or duties.  There is no greater gift than seeing someone’s own personal achievement.  Knowing that through your guidance and encouragement, they have succeeded. 

This brings me round to my current quest.  To foster a healthy mind and spirit, I’m focusing on my health.  I’m not sure where I’ll be in my old age, if I’ll be crawling through caves or climbing mountains.  I do know that I will be seeing the world.  I hope to be setting a positive example and changing lives as I go along.

Moments and Memories

The week ahead should be interesting indeed. I've been on leave for two weeks, with no one to fill in for me. Except for a friend who has her own department to run, I would have been unable to get away for a much needed break. Thanks Tshidi - you are an angel....

I've enjoyed my break away and yet I find myself excited about going back to work tomorrow. I enjoy the buzz, the rush, the challenge and of course my friends.

My best friend Annelize moved away a while ago to Secunda (Yes, I know - what was she thinking) Without her I seem to have gone into a funk. I miss her desperately. We were used to seeing each other often during the course of a week.

As I don't make friends easily I have found the void in my life - life changing.

So all I can say to you out there. Cherish your friends. Life happens and when it does we find that our friends have moved, changed jobs, gotten married, promoted, died and so forth. Cherish each moment that you have with those that you love and hold close to your heart.

My dad has kept in touch with friends that he had when he was just a "laaitie'. I admire that about him. That takes effort and dedication and shows us what the true meaning of friendship is about. Through thick and think, good and bad, far and near. For eva and eva and eva!

The town just doesn't seem the same without them. I know that we have to move along with the times and although I hated and still do hate this dreadful little town, it has been good to me. I have met the most wonderful people and experienced a beautiful part of the country.

I'm not particularly wishing for a bigger infrastructure or better malls etc. I went to school at Kingswood College in Grahamstown and I was thoroughly spoilt with museums and Theatres etc. A town rich in culture and history. That is what I miss.

Burgersfort has no such thing. The history is told but the proof is dispersed and unseen.

I realise that as children we don't always understand an appreciate what our parents had to sacrifice for us to ensure that we have the things we do, the education, the after school activities and extra classes, the outings and tours. All this and so much more.

For all the memories and special moments, I am eternally grateful to my parents and all those who have been a part of my life and have made me the person I am today.

I have also come to realise that we need to take each day and endeavour to make at least one fond memory to keep and cherish. A moment in time that no one can take away from us. Even if it turns out to be a bad memory or moment. Use it to your advantage.

My grandfather always used to say that we need to take the good and the bad and if we don't learn from the bad then we have learnt nothing. Use everything to our advantage. So what if things don't go your way... TODAY. If we use the knowledge, wisdom and understanding at our disposal we will have things going better for us TOMORROW.

So no matter what today has brought to my doorstep. Tomorrow I am going to beat the shit out of the bad/mad/crazy/dreadful things I have had to endure.

I have come across so many people in our town who have the most awful 'pity me' mentality. There is always something to complain about, moan about, bitch about and generally be miserable about. Well I want to say to all of you - get up off your ass and do something about whatever it is that has crawled up your ass to make you such a miserable person. Yes I know that there are factors that do hinder us and make us take stock of our situation. But we can endure so much more and we have so much more strength than we realise to make the most of the down moments. We are all in charge of our own destiny. So forge ahead and don't necessarily follow others - MAKE YOUR OWN PATH.

Tomorrow I am going to start on a healthier lifestyle, so what if my broken leg still hurts and my aging muscles are going to complain (violently if I know them) I have decided that when I die I want to die being the best that I can be. I don't want to be overweight and unhealthy. Yes I intend to be OLD when I die. I want to have lived each day doing so much more than I know I am capable of now.

I am an avid photographer and I want to be able to climb mountains, dive into rivers, cross rickety bridges, crawl into caves and be able to run away from charging Rhino.

I'm gong to give old age and an unhealthy lifestyle a huge run for it's money. So come on life - give me your best shot.

The most intimate part of my family, they share everyday with me!

Here is the mail that got me thinking.....

Hey Mornay,

I just watched this inspiring and well presented speach on using happiness as an indicator for a nations measure of progress. It really is worth watching.

http://www.ted.com/talks/nic_marks_the_happy_planet_index.html

One of the key things that came through were the TOP 5 ways to increase your happiness:

1. Connect - with family and friends
2. Be Active - take a walk or do a sport.
3. Take Notice - be aware of you environment as it changes, notice the weather, your friends faces etc
4. Keep learning - stay curious and learn new things by reading, going to class or teaching yourself.
5. Give - share and give to others, it can be money, your time, or whatever you have to give.

So take a moment now and commit to doing one of these things each day more so that you currently do, and see what happens.

Wishing you a super month ahead!

Zane

Zane Green
Consciousness Coach® (CCI and ICF accredited)

Commerce Degree (UNISA)

zane@happivate.com

www.happivate.com

+27 (0) 82 896 2588

The beginning!!!

This blog idea started with this mail from a guy I had contacted sometime ago, about doing life counselling.  I contacted him after being in Cape Town for about 1 year, and I wasn’t settling in well.   It ended up being very expensive, so I didn’t do it, I have however subsequently settled in.  Well, it’s getting there.  So what I have realised is that I have grown in so many ways, spiritually, as a person, in my business life, and of course physically as well.  But I questioned if I was really happy! I started learning to speak Spanish earlier this month.  And I found myself wondering why?   I didn’t really have an answer, and did I need one.  Well until Zane’s email popped up and I read his “TOP 5 way’s to increase your happiness” – now don’t get  me wrong, I’m not “unhappy”.  Maybe just unfulfilled, knowing that I had the potential to do/be so much more.  So why just exist?  But I do know that with of the plans I have for my life, and the directions I’d like to go in, I would need help, support and encouragement.  Cause let’s face it – we are awesome woman just the way we are, but can you imagine if we got even better!  Hold me back!  “The world is not enough!”
We can get into the nitty gritty’s later on, but I think that that is the gist of it for now!

The Family

I just love them all anyway!  It's family!  We're all together for a reason!

OK - here's the other mother (in yellow) with some other strange people!

And this is my Family - minus a second mother, (will add her), (and a few strangers! Thanks to our brother! love you!!)

Mia Familia: Son Charl and hubby Mark. These two make me laugh, cry, shout and scream with frustration, but at the end of it all, I wouldn't have it any other way.

Well, this is a first for me. Having to write has never been a problem, but putting those words in a very public page - Now makes you sit back and suddenly rethink everything you want to say.
I have come a long way ove the past couple of years. Not just career wise, but spiritually, emotionally, creatively and on so many other levels. I started here in Burgesfort, Mpumalanga as a graphic artist working for local Sign and Printing company, Since then I have done a whole managerie of things, but one of my favourites has been working for a Non Profit organization where we would teach life skills to the local community members is the very rural areas as well as. Working in the mining environment off course teaches you whole new set of skills. But all in all I cannot say I have been unhappy. The town of course is a whole different story. I can't say I like the town, but the people make up for so much...